7:39 a.m. Well, I'm watching the sun rise over a corn field again. This time I'm not on surveillance, though. I'm down the street from my parents' house. Which seems to be the only place I can get an internet connection.
The family reunion with the cousins was great fun.
I brought a certain light-haired-man to meet the family. Can I just say that I LOVE having neices? They are all 14-yrs-old and under and this man was highly fascinating to them. So much so, that they decided to give us both quizes that consisted of questions such as:
1) How many people have you kissed? (The following are my answers)
100...120 if you include family
2) Would you marry light-haired-man?
I'm sorry...your handwriting is too messy. I couldn't read this question. Tell your mother you need to work on your penmanship.
3) How much do you like light-haired-man?
And so on... The little darlings.
There are a LOT of kids running around...18 or so. They are like vermin. I was out in my car Saturday afternoon (the only quiet place on the property) talking on the telephone when one of the younger vermin splatted himself all over the driveway.
I look around for a responsible adult to take care of the situation, but unfortunately I'm the only option. So, I walk over and pick up the crying toddler. "There, there, kid. It's okay. Let's go find your mother." The kid is crying harder...mostly because he's wondering who the hell I am.
I hold him out away from my body and carry him over to the campfire where all of the grown ups are hanging out. I walk by a cousin who seems somewhat concerned. I tell her he seems okay and continue across the porch to where his mother is drinking a beer. She makes no move to take him from me...just looks at me with a completely blank expression. And I'm thinking, What the hell kind of a mother are you? So I say, "He fell and skinned his knee." She looks at me and says, "Oh." Oh, my holy hell.
So I sit the crying kid down on the bench next to her and he immediately jumps down and runs to the cousin I crossed paths with earlier.
Yeah. I gave the kid to the wrong mom.
Well, if there weren't pascel (wink to Cousin Jethro) of kids running around I might be able to keep track of who belongs to who...
Part of the problem is that I forget I'm an adult sometimes. For example, when my 14-yr-old neice asked if she could drive me around the field in the golf cart I thought that was a great idea. Her driving skills were really impressive. That kid would never lose her Subject in a mobile surveillance. She got the thing up on two wheels a number of times. And we even caught air while speeding through the drainage ditch.
But then when I jumped off the cart and walked up to were the adults were gathered around the campfire I quickly realized the error of my ways. I was greeted with several grim looks of disapproval. What? Is my zipper open? I look down. Nope.
I proceeded to be dressed down for letting the 14-yr-old drive the cart. For allowing her to drive like a maniac. For LAUGHING while she drove like a maniac. And for allowing the cart to overheat. (It was only smoking a little.) They took my grown up badge away and I ended up eating at the kids table for dinner that night.