Thursday, May 26, 2005


7:09 a.m. I am back on the case from Tuesday when I got pulled over for reckless driving. I know that my Subject leaves for work at roughly 8:30a.m., so in about 45 minutes I plan to set up near the gas station he stopped at before. If I pick up the tail there, he's very likely not going to notice.

Yesterday I had to do an interview with a Subject under a the pretext of being an insurance company representative. I have the Subject sign a form and give a brief, meaningless interview. Meanwhile, I'm looking around the home for signs that she's working. I'm watching her range of motion as she walks in front of me. This Subject, we'll call her Nikita, is supposed to have back and shoulder issues and I don't notice anything obviously unnatural about her movements.

Nikita is from Russia and has a thick accent. She's about 4'10" tall, blonde, a bit on the heavier side. She keeps saying, "You are so skeeeeeny! What do you do to be so skeeny? Harold! (That's her husband.) Come here and look at how skeeeeeny she is!" I smile. Harold comes in and shakes my hand. They both offer me a plate of pastries and soda. I decline, though those brownies look delish. "Eat!" She says. "You will get sick you are so skeeeeeny!" I smile. "Are you sure you're not Italian?" I ask. She looks puzzled for a second and then laughs. I like her.

We sit down at the kitchen table in their tidy little 1960's bungalow. There are small ceramic pigs all over the place. "Harold, he like the pigs. You see the pigs? He put them everywhere. Over there the biggest." She points to a three foot tall pig statue in the corner of the room. It is standing on two legs and smelling a daisy. Ugh.

Nikita is a kind and has a ready smile. She tells me that she has breast cancer and that she has terrible pain in her knees. She says that she lives with horrible pain everyday. Poor lady. Harold doesn't say much. Everytime I glance at him he's staring at my chest. I wrinkle my nose. Yoo hoo! Up here, buddy. I hold my case file open in front of me. Harold blinks a few times like he just woke up from a trance.

I have Nikita sign the forms and they once again offer me food. I finally relent and take a brownie as I walk out the door. Mmmmm. Good.

8:06 a.m. Okay. I'm heading to the intersection. More later.


Jeff Meyerson said...

Looks like Harold is another in a long line of men picturing Polly in her Girl Scout uniform.

No wonder she's so successful!

Higgy said...

Polly - can you blame the guy? If you came in to my kitchen, I'd be offering you every form of food as well!

So it's off to trail the fatman. Can you give any reason why you're tagging him?

Polly P.I. said...

He's on permanent disability for lower back strain. He's not supposed to be working, but let it slip at his last doctor's visit that he had a job lined up.

Insurance fraud is the bread and butter of my firm, though we do all sorts of other kinds of cases. When I get a slow day, I'm going to write about a rape investigation I did not too long ago.

Brat said...

I hierd a PI for a back injury scam. They got photos of him bowling in leagues 2 a week. Clearing mesquite stumps from a field. Loading hay in his truck.

You'd think that would be the end of that. NOT

I go sit in on the hearing (employers have no rights - the isurance company represents you) and listen in anger as the lawers deal away my guy. Give him $20k in a settlement (this was 1976).

It was kind of a "well this isn't to strong a case, so if you let me have this one, I won't fight you on this one". They must have worked through 30 files.

I pulled my guy aside and told him this was not going to fly. He said I was only an observer and basically to shut up.

When I got back to work we fired the insurance company and got another one PDQ.

Jeff Meyerson said...

It "isn't a strong case"?

What did they need, the guy to pull a locomotive with his teeth on national television?